Current:Home > ContactJim Gaffigan on the "complex process" of keeping his kids' cellphones charged -ProgressCapital
Jim Gaffigan on the "complex process" of keeping his kids' cellphones charged
View
Date:2025-04-14 15:36:54
There are simple annoyances in modern life. We've all woken up to discover our cellphone which had been charging overnight was, well, not charging overnight. And is dead. Or almost dead. Either way, an existential panic sets in. "Oh, no! How will your day go on without your phone? Is it even possible to go about your day without a charged phone?"
For most of us, the memory of discovering an uncharged phone is seared into our consciousness. Most of us. Just not my children.
Yes, my beautiful, intelligent children struggle with keeping a phone charged.
Well, I shouldn't say struggle; they make no effort.
To clarify, when say I children, I'm not talking about toddlers or newborns. I'm talking about teenage human-like creatures who somehow possess the ability to make Nintendo and Roblox purchases with my credit card, but somehow can't figure out how to insert a lightning cord connected to an outlet into a phone.
After repeatedly explaining the "complex process" of charging a cellphone to my "brilliant" children, my wife and I caved and bought some portable chargers. These are external batteries one can grab and use when someone "forgets" to charge their phone overnight. These external batteries were charged the night before, you know, how a logical person might charge their phone.
Anyway, my kids then take these external batteries, charge their phones, and lose them throughout New York City.
If I'm not painting enough of a maddening scenario, you should know this: On numerous occasions I've discovered my "brilliant" children sitting in their room near an outlet, using a portable external charger to charge their phone.
The outlet is right there! With a phone charger plugged into the wall! But instead they are using a portable charger which is…
Anyway, I love being a dad.
For more info:
- jimgaffigan.com | "Barely Alive" tour dates
See also:
- You have summer plans? Jim Gaffigan does not
- On Father's Day Jim Gaffigan ponders the peculiar lives of childless men
- From laughs to ZZZs
- Do you get incessant messages from politicians asking for money? Jim Gaffigan does, too
- Jim Gaffigan is baffled over the mania for pumpkins
- Jim Gaffigan's advice to parents of young kids: It only gets worse
- Super Bowl Sunday: The pageantry and the gluttony
- Jim Gaffigan on 2022: The future is here!
- What would Jesus want for his birthday?
- Jim Gaffigan on the perils of aging gracefully
- On getting the whole lockdown thing wrong
- 2020, please turn your notifications off
- Jim Gaffigan on his first drive-in standup show
- On living in a time warp
- On acquiring a green thumb
- Summer memories, '50s style
- Blondes' bad rap
- In:
- Jim Gaffigan
veryGood! (3984)
Related
- 2024 Olympics: Gymnast Ana Barbosu Taking Social Media Break After Scoring Controversy
- England defeats Serbia in its Euro 2024 opener on Jude Bellingham goal
- Mookie Betts has left hand fracture after being hit by pitch in Dodgers' win over Royals
- Select list of winners at the 2024 Tony Awards
- The GOP and Kansas’ Democratic governor ousted targeted lawmakers in the state’s primary
- Missouri man drives stolen truck onto a runway behind plane that had just landed in St. Louis
- Henry Cavill preps to be a first-time dad in Father's Day post: 'Any tips?'
- Florida couple wins $1 million lottery prize just before their first child is born
- Kylie Jenner Shows Off Sweet Notes From Nieces Dream Kardashian & Chicago West
- Powerball winning numbers for June 15: Jackpot now worth $44 million
Ranking
- Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Joe Burrow owns a $3 million Batmobile Tumbler
- Father's Day deals: Get food and restaurant discounts from Applebee's, KFC, Arby's, Denny's, more
- A$AP Rocky stars alongside his and Rihanna's sons in Father's Day campaign: See the photos
- Ron Washington won't let losses deter belief in Angels: 'Ain't no damn failure'
- The GOP and Kansas’ Democratic governor ousted targeted lawmakers in the state’s primary
- Remains in former home of man convicted of killing wife identified as those of missing ex-girlfriend
- Man on fishing trip drowns trying to retrieve his keys from a lake. Companion tried to save him
- New Jersey’s attorney general charges an influential Democratic power broker with racketeering
Recommendation
Buckingham Palace staff under investigation for 'bar brawl'
University of Michigan didn’t assess if Israel-Hamas war protests made environment hostile, feds say
6 injured in shooting at home in suburban Detroit
Pete Buttigieg on fatherhood
The White House is cracking down on overdraft fees
8 injured after shooting at 'pop-up' party in Methuen, Massachusetts
AI experimentation is high risk, high reward for low-profile political campaigns
2024 Tony Awards: See Every Red Carpet Fashion Moment